You Have Died of Dysentery - Long Sleeve T-Shirt Color:Black A gray crosscut saw banner

A gray crosscut saw banner with brown handles displays dark block serif text reading "JOHN MATRIX

Circular badge split into a red upper half and blue lower half

a blue pom-pom on its head

" with a decorative swoosh underline beneath it

You Have Died of Dysentery - Long Sleeve T-Shirt Color:Black A gray crosscut saw bannerOregon Trail taught an entire generation that manifest destiny ends not with a bang but with violent diarrhea, announced in the same calm green font as a math quiz. Every elder millennial's real history education fits on a floppy disk and a tombstone. The Details: Green monochrome pixel art depicts an ox hitched to a covered wagon, rendered in blocky 8 bit style mimicking an Apple II green phosphor display. A bordered rectangle below contains